Chapter 165: The Same Pathological Desire

Nathan Lockwood gave Zoe Pierce a deep look and, under her piercing gaze, said, "No."

Zoe Pierce froze for a second, then immediately shot Nathan Lockwood a look of disbelief. "You promised."

’He’s still denying it, even now?’

Nathan Lockwood said, "What I said was: make a deal."

"You cooperate with us to complete the league, and I’ll give you news about Damien Pierce."

He had never actually had to criticize her.

Zoe Pierce almost laughed out of sheer anger. ’So now he’s twisting the truth.’

As if sensing her skepticism, Nathan Lockwood added, "You’ve always performed exceptionally well."

’We were the ones who schemed.’

"But now, you don’t have to be so perfect," Nathan Lockwood said suddenly, his eyes on Zoe Pierce. "You can rely on us sometimes."

Zoe Pierce slowed her pace. "Is that right?"

Nathan Lockwood closed the small distance between their shoulders. "It doesn’t matter who it is—any of us. As long as they can make you happy, that’s all that matters."

"Aren’t I your girlfriend now?" Zoe Pierce lowered her voice, her eyes drifting to the nearby street vendors. "Why are you trying to push me off on someone else?"

A stand with some nice carvings caught Nathan Lockwood’s eye, and he steered Zoe Pierce in that direction. "Because we all want you to love yourself first, before you love anyone else."

He understood her desperation, how she clung to them like pieces of driftwood.

He also understood the relentless drive that kept her pushing forward, never stopping to rest.

His heart ached for her, yet he also loved and respected her deeply.

"It doesn’t matter who is by your side. All that matters is that when you want to stop, you can."

’She was already more than good enough.’

But a person’s heart isn’t driftwood, and no one is an island.

She was human, too. And in the matter of Damien Pierce, she had already shown more than enough vulnerability.

They couldn’t bear to see it happen a second time.

Zoe Pierce picked up a small wooden carving. It was a figurine of a little boy dressed in a distinctive outfit woven from straw. Her fingers traced the smooth wood as she suddenly asked, "Nathan Lockwood, how about I give you this little guy as a gift?"

Seeing the figurine Zoe Pierce held, the stall owner said with a wide grin, "That’s one of a pair. The other one’s right here."

He pointed to a wooden figurine of a little girl, gesturing to Nathan Lockwood.

Nathan Lockwood picked up the other figurine the owner had mentioned. "Great. We’ll take both."

He didn’t try to pay for Zoe Pierce’s figurine. Instead, Zoe paid for the little boy, and he paid for the little girl.

Only, when it was time to take them, he silently took the little boy figurine for himself.

Zoe Pierce, in turn, took the other one and placed it in her Space Button.

She had been planning to look a bit more, but seeing that Nathan Lockwood was already preparing to leave the stall, she said, "I just saw another carving that was really unique..."

"I don’t want the gifts you get for them to be the same as mine." Nathan Lockwood’s words immediately silenced her.

It was broad daylight. They hadn’t even held hands. There hadn’t been a single intimate gesture between them. And yet, Zoe Pierce felt it.

His possessiveness, and a sense of intimacy that belonged only to him.

’A gift meant only for the two of them.’

She followed behind Nathan Lockwood, her eyes fixed on his back.

It wasn’t broad and sturdy like Chase Shaw’s, nor sprightly like Erin Xavier’s, nor was it steady and composed like Miles Sherman’s.

His was straight and tall, like green bamboo. The image of his calm eyes was etched into her mind, stroke by stroke.

Her heart suddenly began to race. A strange heat bloomed from her earlobes and spread across her cheeks. It was hot.

She reached out her hand and, with surprising accuracy, caught his fingers.

"Nathan Lockwood, can you slow down a little?"

She was only holding his index and middle fingers, yet she felt her own fingertips begin to burn.

His fingers twitched, and she flinched involuntarily.

But in the next instant, his hand closed firmly around hers. Zoe Pierce froze, watching as Nathan Lockwood turned to face her completely. "Zoe Pierce, are you trying to drive me insane?"

Zoe Pierce: "..."

’She wasn’t.’

She instinctively tried to pull away. ’Maybe he misunderstood because I grabbed his hand.’

But Nathan Lockwood’s grip was too tight. So tight that Zoe Pierce couldn’t break free, and she could feel the sheer force in his grasp.

He pulled her into a quick walk, leading her into a dim alley. Outside, the street still bustled with the clamor of crowds and vendors.

Here, however, they were shrouded in shadow, with only a few stray beams of light illuminating the walls.

They moved farther and farther from the crowd, heading toward the very end of the alley.

"Nathan Lockwood..."

The moment she said his name, Nathan Lockwood stopped. He pressed her against the wall, but instead of kissing her, he rested his head on her shoulder, their fingers still tightly laced together.

"Zoe Pierce, are you doing this on purpose?"

His voice even curled up at the end. "You know full well we shouldn’t be holding hands out in public."

Zoe knew they shouldn’t. There were too many people, too many prying eyes. But strictly speaking, all she’d done was tug on his hand to get him to slow down.

It was Nathan Lockwood who had grabbed her hand properly and refused to let go.

Just as she was thinking this, Nathan Lockwood released her hand, only to wrap his arms around her instead. Her own hands instinctively clutched at his shirt.

"You’re really going to drive me crazy," Nathan Lockwood murmured, a wave of intense regret washing over him.

He wanted her all to himself. He wanted to hold her hand and embrace her in public, without hiding. He wanted to make more memories with her.

So much for his calmness and self-control.

Zoe Pierce’s face was buried in his chest. She didn’t know what to say. But in this moment, she found herself craving an embrace just like this one.

A quiet embrace, hidden away from the world.

*

In the end, the two of them bought two handmade crafts for Miles Sherman’s younger siblings.

In this age of advanced technology, it was easy to mass-produce standardized goods. But handmade items were unique, possessing a natural charm that was recognizable at a single glance.

A distance of nearly half a meter once again separated Nathan Lockwood’s and Zoe Pierce’s shoulders.

As he watched Zoe Pierce walk to her door, Nathan Lockwood’s throat bobbed. "I’ll give the gifts to Miles and the others. Get some rest."

This wasn’t the Starship. Here in the hotel, there were other teachers besides them.

Zoe Pierce rested her hand on the door and whispered, "Okay."

’She couldn’t possibly invite Nathan Lockwood in.’

’And Nathan Lockwood wouldn’t come in either.’

"Close the door." He paused. "Check your Intelligent Brain."

Zoe hummed in acknowledgment and closed the door.

Leaning against the door, she had a sudden moment of understanding, as if she finally grasped what her college roommate’s relationships had been like.

The boy would walk her to the entrance of her dorm, and even though they’d see each other the very next day, even though there were countless ways to communicate, she would still turn back for one last look after going inside.

To see his retreating back, or the smile on his face.

She had never understood it before. She had always been too busy struggling with her reality, with no time at all to fall into that kind of romance.

But now, for the very first time, she was experiencing that feeling for herself.

Her reality was still just as harsh, still demanding her constant effort.

The only difference was, now, there were people so clearly expressing how much they needed her.

An urgent, almost pathological need for her.

And she, in turn, was like someone drinking poison to quench their thirst—desperate, yet deeply unsettled.

In that moment, Zoe Pierce became keenly, soberingly aware of a flaw in her own character. She wanted someone... She didn’t want to be thrown away again...