Chapter 377: Outmatched In Shamelessness

But just as his dignity was about to crumble completely, the lamia girl sighed, her proud expression softening.

"But...I can’t blame you completely either."

"Oh?" Cassius blinked, hopeful that she changed her mind, but was left in dismay at what she said.

"Yes." She nodded gravely, then placed her hand against her cheek with the kind of shameless pride only she could muster. "Because it’s also my fault for being so beautiful. My beauty is a sin. It’s only natural that men would want to give up their lives to save me."

Cassius actually felt tears pricking his eyes.

’She’s...she’s even more shameless than me...’

But then, to his utter shock, she leaned down close again, her voice suddenly tender. Her golden eyes softened, her earlier smirk fading into sincerity.

"But still...even if you’re stupid. Even if you’re an idiot...You were also the same stupid idiot who saved my life."

"Without you, I wouldn’t be here right now. I wouldn’t even be talking. I’d already be nothing but a puddle of acid, dissolved completely...and Grandma wouldn’t even have a body left to mourn."

Her voice cracked, her lips trembling as she whispered.

"So no matter what I said before, I’m still grateful. Thank you. Thank you so much...for saving me."

For a moment, Cassius just stared. Then finally, finally, he let out a long sigh of relief.

"See, now that..." He muttered with a faint chuckle. "...is what you should’ve said to begin with. Not all those insults to a dying man. That was the least you could do."

"Sorry, sorry. I’ve always had a blabber mouth." She gave him a sheepish smile, her cheeks warming slightly. "I just say whatever comes to mind, never holding back."

Cassius groaned. "You don’t say..."

"But even if you are shallow, which you are..." She added, stabbing him in the heart again. "...you’re also brave. Braver than most men. You gave your life for what you believed in. And that’s admirable."

Her eyes shimmered again, tears slipping down her cheeks.

"But now...because of that, you’re going to die. And I...I don’t know what I’ll do with that. I don’t know how I’ll feel if you..."

Her voice cracked, breaking into little sobs, her tail trembling as she tried to hold herself together.

After seeing the girl’s tears spill again, Cassius couldn’t help but feel his own sharp edges soften.

For all her shameless bravado, for all the absurd things she had just blurted out that made him want to actually die of embarrassment, he realized she was, at her core, simply genuine.

She said whatever came to her heart, raw and unfiltered, even if it was ridiculous. And that honesty...amused him far more than if she had just been another "normal" girl fawning over his so-called heroics.

Strange as she was, he found himself far more interested in her now than he had been at first.

Still, he was also a little irritated.

His back was burning like it had been set on fire, organs practically sliding out, and yet somehow he was the one being insulted, called shallow, shameless, stupid.

No, he couldn’t let it end like that.

He decided then and there that he deserved a little revenge, even if it came in the form of teasing her.

So, putting on his best "tragic hero" expression, he turned his face dramatically toward the moon above and spoke in a low, melancholic tone.

"It’s alright...it’s alright. What’s done is done. There’s no reason to cry anymore, little serpent."

She sniffed loudly, quickly wiping at her wet cheeks, as if taking his words to heart.

He continued, deliberately laying it on thick.

"I’ve lived a good life. I’ve seen things, done things...fulfilled many of my dreams. But even still..."

He let his voice trail off, his eyes narrowing into sorrow.

"Even still...I can’t say I don’t have regrets. There’s one last wish, one last desire I’ll never see fulfilled. And now...I’ll die with it unfulfilled."

Immediately, her head snapped forward, her tail coiling anxiously around her.

"What regret?! Tell me!" She pleaded, her eyes wide and still brimming with tears. "I’ll take responsibility! I’ll do it for you! Whatever it is, I’ll carry it out myself!"

He sighed, shaking his head. "No...there’s no need. It’s too much to ask."

But she shook her head furiously, almost smacking him with her horns.

"No, no! I really mean it! I want to do something for you, anything! You saved me, it was supposed to be me dying! I can’t just sit here and let you die with regrets!" Her voice rose with desperation. "It doesn’t matter what it is, if it’s traveling across the world, if it’s delivering a message, if it’s finding a legendary treasure, I’ll do it! Just tell me what it is!"

Cassius looked at her, biting back a smirk.

’Hook, line, and sinker.’

With a sigh of great suffering, he said in a low tone,

"It’s nothing so grand. Nothing about treasure or journeys. It’s...more private. More intimate. Honestly...a little embarrassing to admit."

Her eyes darted around quickly, then she leaned closer until her lips were nearly brushing his ear.

"It’s alright." She whispered. "There’s no one around. You can say it to me. I won’t tell anyone. No matter what it is, it won’t change anything. You’re my savior, whatever you say won’t affect me."

"Really? You mean that?" He asked, giving her a searching look.

She nodded solemnly. "Of course. Whatever it is...just say it."

Cassius inhaled deeply, steeling himself, then looked her straight in the eyes.

"The truth is...I’ve always been a womanizer."

She blinked once, twice, then nodded as if it all made sense.

"Oh, that explains everything. You threw yourself in front of acid for a woman, that’s exactly what a womanizer would do."

He cleared his throat, slightly thrown off by her casual acceptance. "Right...but here’s the regret."

He raised a finger, speaking with the tone of a man confessing his last truth.

"In my travels, I’ve met many women. Different shapes, sizes, figures, so many that I’ve lost count. And yet...despite meeting so many, I’ve never..." He paused for dramatic effect. "...never met a woman with a chest so big I could bury my entire face in it."

The lamia girl’s mouth fell open, her entire face heating red. She hadn’t expected it to take that turn.

Cassius pressed on, his gaze sliding down to her own generous curves.

"I’ve searched far and wide, through towns and kingdoms...but never found one. Until now. Right here, before me, you have the very chest I’ve been seeking all my life. Part of the reason I even saved you..." He gave her a weak, tragic smile. "...was because I was utterly enamored by them. I thought, maybe, just maybe, I’d have the chance."

"...But instead, it’s cost me my life. And now I’ll die without knowing the bliss of burying my face in them."

Her cheeks burned hotter, her tail twitching wildly.

"That’s why." Cassius whispered, stretching out a trembling hand as though clinging to his final hope. "If you truly wish to fulfill my last wish...then bare your chest, press it against my face, and let me drown in it."

"...Only then can I die without regrets."

He closed his eyes dramatically, waiting for the moment of victory.

But instead, the lamia girl just stared at him blankly, her expression flat as stone. Then she said, in the most casual, matter-of-fact tone possible.

"Oh. I see. Well, in that case...I guess you’re going to die full of regrets after all."

Cassius’s eyes shot open.

"W-W-Wait, what?!" He jabbed a trembling finger at her, utterly betrayed. "You—you, what are you saying?! Didn’t you promise to fulfill my last regret? Don’t you understand what I’m asking?!"

"You idiot! Don’t you dare shout back at me!" Her cheeks puffed up as she yelled right back, flustered and furious. "I thought it was going to be something decent! Something noble!"

"...But who would’ve thought you’d ask for something so shameless and perverted?! Do you take me for some prostitute?!"

She covered her chest with both arms, face blazing red.

"I’m a pure, wholesome girl! I’ve been saving this, this..." She gestured vaguely at her cleavage. "...for the man I love! Not just some shallow idiot who asks me to press my breasts on his face while he bleeds out!"

Cassius gaped, utterly crushed. He wanted to argue, but her words, damn it, made complete sense. Practical sense.

He hated how much sense it made.

Desperate, he tried again, groaning. "But...But I saved your life! My back is melting! My spine is half gone! And all I’m asking for is one thing, just one, to make up for it!"

"And I am grateful! Very grateful!" She huffed, nose upturned proudly. "But that doesn’t mean I have to show you my breasts. That was your choice, not mine. I didn’t ask you to save me. You threw yourself in front of that attack all on your own."

"...If anything, it’s your fault for being so shameless and perverted in the first place!"

Her voice rang with conviction.

"So, don’t try to make me feel guilty about my chest!"

Cassius felt an arrow pierce clean through his heart. He collapsed back against the ground, defeated.

For the first time in his life, the great Cassius, master of shamelessness, king of dramatics, had been utterly destroyed.

Not by poison. Not by blades. Not even by a legendary leviathan.

But by facts...Logic.

And the most formidable opponent of all: a shameless lamia girl who was, somehow, even more shameless than him...