Chapter 426: How to gaslight a friendship.

*Bing-Bong*

The writer of this work would like to make a quick pause of your reading in order to make the following PSA: Don’t gaslight people into being your friend.

If you want to be friends with someone, be open and honest, and don’t create a strange situation where you both mutually share a particular misery together in order to become closer.

Thank you for your time, we no return to your regularly scheduled program.

...

Did we seriously have to make a PSA about honesty?

|You’d be surprised at the sheer amount of people re-enacting books and movies in order to acquire love and friendship...that or because of misguided attempts at morality.|

I... you’re joking, right?

|Propaganda is a bitch.|

Huh...

*Bing-Bong*

________________________________________________

[I still can’t believe that this all actually worked,] Nepherage stated with disbelief, [I honestly figured we would need Logos and Pathos to scramble their memories.]

[Honestly...same...but...this...is...par...for...the...course...for...us...,] Frosttusk noted.

[In fairness, mi amigos, none of us expected Lady Jin Fang to be so... devious ,] Hurricroak added.

[Yeah...]

[Speak for yourselves,] Razorstella protested, [something about her always gave me a weird vibe, even when I was just a proto.]

[Weren’t you alive only a few weeks ago, max?]

[Statement stands.]

As the kaijin kept watch over the blooming friendship between an unwitting bystander and a would-be assassin, they began to think back about just how absurd such a situation this truly was given everything that had happened.

Granted, it was all under the coordination of Lady Jin Fang.

________________________________________________

Literally several hours prior...

A bit after Zhen Liu had met up with the kaijin, each carrying their respective unconcious victim, the group immediately made their way over to the part of the ship where Jin Fang was sleeping.

They had a few close calls on their way there, pertaining to mostly running into patrolling crewmen or fellow Zhen Clan members from either the main branch or the side branch.

However, through sheer luck or maybe having finally a developed a sense for espionage and subterfuge, they managed to get the two unconcious fellows directly to the doorstep of Jin Fang’s sleeping quarters.

After that was the simple matter of knocking on the door to get her attention.

As soon as she had opened the door to see why someone was knocking on her door in the dead of night, her expressions went from annoyed to surprised to...something that Zhen Liu didn’t have a word for other than "professional".

It was a bit weird seeing her act so authoritative...it was kinda hot though...

"Xiao Liu...what the fuck did you get yourself into this time?"

"Honestly, I am as confused as you are."

"Right..."

"Apologies for waking you up in the middle of night, Lady Jin Fang."

"It’s okay Nepherage, it’s okay...this is technically more important," Jin Fang said in a mildly tired tone as she accepted the apology.

Jin Fang then proceeded to look over the two comatose individuals, taking mental notes on the condition of both and coming up with a plan on how to deal with this.

"Wait, don’t you have Logos and Pathos to normally deal with stuff like this?," Jin Fang asked as soon as she kept evaluating the status of the two unconcious fellows, "can’t they just scramble the memories of these two and you guys just ditch them somewhere on the ship?"

"We actually did try to do that about halfway here," Hurricroak answered, "but the two of them were still in the middle of teaching Jasper and Janice how to read via astronomy."

"Huh...okay."

With the answer given, and her evaluation now done, Jin Fang proceeded to step away from the two victims and took on a more thoughtful posture. The foundations for two plans quickly forming.

Depending on how Zhen Liu answered her next question, she would need to only execute one of them.

"Alright, Xiao Liu, did you want to keep these two alive still, or did you want to dispose of their bodies after killing them in a bloodless manner and making it look like an accident?," Jin Fang asked in a suspiciously casual tone.

Zhen Liu was a bit taken back by the question and tone, but managed to answer coherently.

"Yeah, let’s not kill them. I think doing so might lead to unnecessary diplomatic issues between grandfather and the main branch...or the crew we’re sailing with..."

"Hmmm, fair enough. In that case, I’ll need my make-up kit and something to bribe the ships cook with...huh. I think this is the first time I’ve had to fake a scene with live people instead of corpses...this should be interesting."

[Did...did she just casually admit to tampering with murder scenes,] Razorstella asked her fellow kaijin with the mental link.

[Yup...,] Frosttusk nodded.

What follow after Jin Fang’s questionable statement was a surprisingly coordinated effort to fake not a death scene, but a drunken encounter instead.

This entailed using some make-up to make the two men look less physically assaulted and more internally damaged from alcohol, subtly altering their clothes so that they had slightly sloppy drunkness to them as well as the scent of mildly faded alcohol to them, dragging them to the ship’s galley so that they could be positioned in just the right way, and then bribing the ship’s cook with a few gold coins and the recipe for hash browns so he wouldn’t say a word about this to anyone, provide a bottle of cheap booze that they could use and also feed the two soon-to-be friends the bullshit story about what had happened to them.

"Wait, that’s what this whacky looking knife is used for? Shredding stuff? Damn, that is significantly easier than using a knife, thank the heavens!"

During all of this set-up time though, Zhen Liu’s curiosity finally got the better of him and he had to ask about his girlfriend’s... particularl skill set.

"Jin Fang..."

"Yes, Xiao Liu?"

"I probably should’ve asked about this around the time you rolled up with what was apparently my mother’s interrogation kit the first time we had to deal with unconscious people we had accidentally kidnapped, but did my mother teach you how to do all of this, or...?"

"By all of ’this’, do you mean the torture techniques, the fact that I know how to fake a crime scene or how to dispose of a body be it alive or dead?," Jin Fang asked with a somewhat enigmatic tone.

"Yes, that’s what I meant."

"In that case...yes, Lady Daria taught me how to do all of this. Even had me help her with some cases."

"Okay...more questions for later...why?," Zhen Liu followed up

"To make a long story short, Lady Daria wanted to make sure that I could dispose of any evidence in the event one of your cousins or one of the elders decided to try and do something unsavory towards you."

"That’s...dark."

"To be fair, they did bully you up until you broke though and proceeded to, as Logos once told me, ’kick ass, take names and chew bubblegum’. Rather crass and I have no idea what bubblegum is, but it sounded appropriate."

"Fair enough, but please stop picking up vocabulary from them."

"Mmm...no. Now help me drink this bottle of rum so we can make this scene more believable."

"Okay, wait...shouldn’t we just dump it on them?," Zhen Liu pointed out.

"No, it’s a waste of good rum."

"Alright...cheers?"

"Cheers."

*Clink*

______________________________________________

[Milord, I am happy to report that Operation: Fake a Friendship, has gone off without a hitch,] Nepherage reported to Zhen Liu.

’Sweet.’

[We also finally learned the names of those people we knocked out,] Hurricroak added, [Nemo the sailor and Zhen Gou of the main branch. Apparently that guy was a true blood or whatever the term is.]

’Oh shit, thank the gods I didn’t kill him.’

[Right??]

[Anyways, director,] Razorstella interjected, [do you want us to stick and keep watching these two, or are we free to go back and wander around the ship? The chummy attitude is starting to get to me.]

’Yeah, feel free to do whatever.’

[Huzzah!]

[Are you going to be getting out of bed soon, milord?]

’Probably, just...need a few minutes.’

________________________________________________

After receiving the latest news from the kaijin, Zhen Liu let out a quiet sigh of relief.

While he had no doubt about Jin Fang’s methodology, he couldn’t help but still be a little nervous about everything going off without a hitch.

’I feel like I should tell the woman of the hour the goods news, but...I just can’t bring myself to wake her yet.’

As of this moment in time, Zhen Liu was laying in his cabin bed, wide awake, as Jin Fang herself was currently sleeping away with her head on his chest.

The reason for this moment?

Jin Fang wanted a reward for helping Zhen Liu deal with the unconcious people, in the form of cuddling.

’Apparrently the last guy never did this before, so...progress I guess?," Zhen Liu mused to himself.

It was a very peaceful moment on this cruise, and heaven willing, it wouldn’t be the last peaceful moment.