"Why me!!!???"
Megumin was shaking Kazuma, her face flustered. When Megumin was chosen, everyone else sighed in relief, though Darkness looked a little disappointed.
"Well, Aqua doesn't even look like a heroine, for starters..."
"What did you say, Kazuma!! Why don't I look like a heroine!!"
Hearing Kazuma's words, Aqua, with an angry expression, started shaking him along with Megumin.
"Wait, calm down and let him explain."
When I intervened, Kazuma continued his explanation.
"So, Yunyun likes Tae-jin, so she's out. Darkness's looks are exactly my type, but... her personality is a bit... Wiz is also good, but she's a lich... So the only one left is Megumin."
At that, all the women except Yunyun started shaking Kazuma together.
Megumin: "So you're saying I was just chosen by process of elimination!"
Aqua: "Are you saying I'm not even a woman?"
Wiz: "Is this racial discrimination!"
Darkness: "Ah~ bullying him like this is also kind of nice. Maybe I'm discovering a new side of myself! Drool~"
It seemed the women, having not been chosen by Kazuma, had their pride wounded. Truly, a woman's heart is hard to understand. They were acting like they didn't want to be chosen, avoiding eye contact.
"Alright, alright, calm down. Anyway, since Megumin has been chosen, let's start with a date."
We dressed Megumin in a pretty dress and gave her light makeup to prepare her. Kazuma also dressed up handsomely in a suit.
"So I said this place is good. You can see the whole village, so it's a nice evening date course."
"No, there's a large butcher shop nearby, so when the wind blows, the smell of meat comes up here. It's not ideal."
The women were far too passionate about planning the course, even though it wasn't even their own date.
"Let's just go with this for now and send them off. If we take too much time, they might not be able to enjoy the date."
"Got it."
We roughly put together a date course and sent Megumin and Kazuma off.
"Ugh... do we really have to do this?"
"We have no choice. If Kazuma dies, our party is finished."
Megumin looked extremely reluctant, but Aqua and Darkness comforted her.
Finally, Kazuma and Megumin started their date. We had timed the course well, so it seemed like there wouldn't be any problems.
"Now! Let's start our date, honey~"
At Kazuma's cheesy 'honey', Megumin's face turned pale, but she managed a smile and said,
"O-okay. Let's go, honey..."
We followed behind, hiding and cheering them on.
"Good job, Megumin."
Judging by their expressions, they were thoroughly enjoying themselves.
First, they went to a quiet but atmospheric cafe in Axel Village. They ordered sliced cake and tea at an outdoor table and enjoyed the atmosphere.
"Honey, ah~"
Kazuma cut a small piece of cake with his fork and held it out to Megumin.
"Ugh... ah~"
Megumin, managing her expression as best she could, ate the cake Kazuma offered.
"Come on, you have to give me some too, honey, ah~"
"O-okay..."
Megumin also cut a piece of cake and put it in Kazuma's mouth.
"Wow~ The mood is good, isn't it? At this rate, they might really start dating."
Aqua said excitedly. She seemed to be enjoying this the most. Kazuma and Megumin also watched a play together, browsed the market, and snacked. We followed behind, eating the croquettes we had bought earlier to tide us over.
"Hey~ Kazuma! Oh, Megumin, are you on a daβ"
Just as Keith and Dust showed up and tried to greet Kazuma, I quickly grabbed them, covered their mouths, and pulled them into a nearby alley. Kazuma looked back for a moment when he heard his name, but I acted faster, so luckily we weren't caught.
"Be quiet. Can't you see you should be disturbing them right now?"
"Ah~ so that's what it is? Hohoho~ Got it. You should never interrupt something like that."
Keith and Dust said they understood and went elsewhere. Seeing that, Aqua sighed in relief and said,
"That was close. We need to keep watching closely. Who knows what other interruptions might appear."
As evening approached, we saw Kazuma and Megumin enter a restaurant for dinner. We followed and got a table in the back, ordering simple meals to eat while watching them. Since Kazuma had no experience with this sort of thing, he was being a bit too forward, and Megumin seemed to be struggling.
Finally, Kazuma and Megumin went to a hill overlooking all of Axel Village, where they set the mood and enjoyed the night view.
"I had fun today. Actually, this is my first time experiencing something like this. Love is a wonderful thing."
"I'm glad you enjoyed it."
Kazuma, setting the mood, slowly took Megumin's hand, closed his eyes, and slowly tried to kiss her. Megumin, extremely flustered, her face red, quickly covered Kazuma's mouth and said,
"This is my first time doing something like this... I'm not mentally prepared yet..."
"Ah, I see! I wasn't considerate of your first kiss. I understand. We still have three days left."
At Kazuma's declaration of 'three days', Megumin's face turned pale again. And so the date ended. The two returned home holding hands. Kazuma looked quite satisfied, but Megumin looked the opposite.
While Kazuma went to his room, we secretly took Megumin outside and held another strategy meeting. First, Aqua said,
"Something's missing. We need a bigger impact."
Darkness added,
"Right! At this rate, the necklace might not come off."
Hearing that, Megumin got angry.
"Are you saying that because it's not your problem? I almost kissed Kazuma today!"
Wiz and Yunyun at least tried to comfort Megumin, but Darkness and Aqua, ignoring them, started seriously brainstorming ideas.
"Right! Let's go camping and play in the lake! If lovers want to get closer, swimming in swimsuits is the best! And if we add delicious food, wouldn't that be unbeatable?"
As expected, Aqua's head worked well at times like this. Everyone was amazed by Aqua's idea.
"Oh~ That's a great idea! Amazing!"
Hearing that, Megumin despaired, but everyone else was excited about swimming. The funny thing was that even Wiz and Yunyun, who had been comforting Megumin, stopped doing so and started making camping plans. Weren't these guys getting a bit too excited, with the person in question right in front of them? Looking at Megumin, she seemed to have given up on everything, sitting silently in a corner with a soul-emptied expression, saying nothing.
The next day, I woke up early and prepared the tents, portable stoves, and food for the camping trip. The weather was a bit cloudy, but I used [Weather Manipulation] to make it clear and slightly warm.
We all moved to the lake near Axel Village. Kazuma was thrilled at the prospect of playing in the water with his 'lover'. Since we were all going today, Luna and Chris, who was home for the first time in a while, came along too. Chris looked at the weather curiously.
"That's strange... This is supposed to still be a chilly season, but it's so warm."
"Ahaha, well, that happens sometimes."
"Anyway, did you get the breast enlargement pills?"
"Not yet. I haven't found them."
"Hurry up and find them. I'm busy too, you know."
"Yeah, I know. But why are you so busy?"
"Th-that's..."
Chris flustered, couldn't answer.
"You're not just running around doing bad things, are you?"
"It's not!!"
I knew. Chris's true identity was the goddess Eris. So she was busy covering for Aqua, and also busy collecting sacred treasures that could pose a threat to the world, so she had little free time.
"Anyway, I'm looking for them whenever I can, so don't worry."
"Alright."
And so we arrived at the lake, set up the tents, took out the stoves and various water play equipment, and started inflating them. The women went into the tents to change into their swimsuits. In the meantime, I went around the lake and cleared out any monsters that might spoil the mood.
After checking the surroundings with [Observation Color], it seemed almost clear, so I returned to where the kids were and started preparing the food. Since Kazuma was the star of the show today, I decided to just act as an assistant.
The interesting thing was Kazuma's physique. Unlike the original story, he had trained hard in swordsmanship, so he had built a good amount of muscle and even had a prince's line on his abs. He was decent to look at. The women were somewhat surprised by it.
"Oh~ Kazuma! So you really did train hard."
When Darkness said that to Kazuma, he answered proudly,
"Right? I've worked hard too!"
Kazuma showed off his muscles by striking various poses. The women applauded him. Just then, Luna came to me and asked,
"Tae-jin, why haven't you changed into a swimsuit? Your body is even more amazing."
"Well, today is all about Kazuma, so I decided to stay like this."
"Ah~ because of the necklace. I see."
Luna had been briefed yesterday, so she understood quickly. Kazuma was having a great time playing in the water with the women. In the meantime, I grilled skewers and prepared the food. Since Luna was pregnant and shouldn't overdo it, she played in the water a little, then rested beside me and helped a bit with the food preparation. It was certainly pleasing to the eye to see the voluptuous figures of Luna, Darkness, Wiz, and Yunyun accentuated by their swimsuits.
"Everyone, time to eat!"
When I called out that food was ready, everyone came over, grabbed a few skewers, and started eating deliciously.
"As expected, Tae-jin's cooking is the best!"
"I agree, it's so delicious."
Seeing everyone complimenting and enjoying my grilled skewers made me happy. After the meal, we played a watermelon splitting game for dessert. Then, to give Megumin and Kazuma some alone time, we all worked together to prepare dinner.
"Hohoho, honey~ come and catch me~"
"Hahaha, it's hard to catch you when you run like that~"
Hahaha~ Hohoho~
Watching Kazuma and Megumin running around on the sand playing tag, I felt my eyes rotting, so I just focused on preparing the food. For dinner, I prepared a whole roasted pig barbecue. Since it would take time, I had partially cooked it in advance, so we were able to enjoy dinner without any problems.
At night, we finished with fireworks and returned home. Kazuma looked satisfied again today, but Megumin, exhausted from being tormented by him, seemed to have gone straight to her room and fallen asleep.
"That's strange. He seemed satisfied, so why hasn't the necklace come off?"
"Indeed..."
The women gathered for a meeting, but they were all puzzled as to why Kazuma's necklace hadn't come off. So I offered an opinion.
"Maybe it only comes off when he gets married?"
Hearing that, Aqua said,
"Then it can't be helped. Let's start preparing the wedding tomorrow."
And so, without Megumin present, we decided among ourselves to go ahead with a wedding ceremony and began preparations.
The next day, the sounds of hammering could be heard coming from outside the house. When Kazuma and Megumin came out, they saw the wedding preparations. Kazuma was so moved he cried.
"Everyone, thank you. I'll definitely live happily."
But Megumin, unable to speak with Kazuma in front of her, had an extremely dark expression. Kazuma offered to help decorate the wedding venue. While he was doing that, Megumin came to us and complained angrily.
"Hey! We never agreed to have a wedding ceremony!"
Aqua tried to convince Megumin.
"The necklace still hasn't come off. And it's just an act, so don't worry too much."
The preparations were completed by the next day, and the wedding ceremony began. The funny thing was, somehow word had spread. Many people from the Guild came to celebrate. It turned out Keith and Dust had spread the rumor. What we had intended to be a small, intimate pretend ceremony had become enormous.
"What are we going to do about this!!!"
Megumin, now in a wedding dress, complained to us vehemently.
"It can't be helped. It's to save Kazuma. Hehe~!"
As expected, Aqua's way with words was amazing. She had a 'whatever will be, will be' attitude. Then Darkness chimed in.
"We still have time. Maybe the necklace will come off during the ceremony."
Yunyun also spoke as if cheering Megumin on.
"Yeah, there's still time."
Hearing that, Megumin complained, dumbfounded, but the women somehow managed to soothe her, and the wedding ceremony proceeded. Since I had prepared plenty of food in advance, there was no shortage.
This time as well, a priest of the Eris Sect officiated.
"May the blessing of Lady Eris be upon the groom and bride for their future lives together... Groom, you may kiss the bride."
Kazuma slowly approached Megumin to kiss her. Flustered, Megumin tried to back away, but Kazuma approached more quickly, held her so she couldn't escape, and kissed her.
"Waaah~ mmmph!"
Smack~!
Clunk!
"With this, the two are now husband andβ"
Just then, Megumin, with an extremely angry face, covered the priest's mouth and shouted,
"This wedding is invalid!!!!"
Megumin pointed to the necklace that had fallen from Kazuma's neck. It seemed that, satisfied with the kiss, the necklace had come off.
After shouting that, Megumin suddenly began chanting the incantation for Explosion magic. It seemed she had been holding a lot in.
"Waaah!!! Run!!!"
Seeing that, people started fleeing like mad, and Aqua quickly tried to convince Megumin.
"Hey, wait a minute, Megumin. It's not that I don't understand how you feel, but there are a lot of people here!!! Besides, Kazuma is alive because the necklace came off, so..."
At that, Megumin glared at Aqua fiercely and said,
"You're the worst!!!"
"Eeep!"
Aqua's attempt to convince her only seemed to make Megumin angrier; it didn't help at all. Just then, Kazuma stepped forward and, as if trying to soothe Megumin, said,
"Honey! You can't do that~! We're married now, so you have to listen to your husband~ Come on, stop the magic, dear!"
Kazuma seemed to be having too much fun with the act we had set up. Those words were the final blow. Megumin's face turned frightening, veins bulging on her forehead, and she poured all the accumulated frustration into the very spot where Kazuma was standing, unleashing her Explosion magic.
"Explosion!!!!"
KABOOOM~!!!!
"Gyaaah!!"
Kazuma, hit directly by the Explosion magic, turned to ash and disappeared. As a result, a massive crater was created in the yard of Kazuma's mansion, and the building was half destroyed.
Fortunately, Kazuma's mansion was located in a quiet, remote area on the outskirts of the village, and aside from a cemetery, there was nothing else nearby.
Also, all the wedding guests were adventurers, so they had quickly fled. The only casualty was Kazuma. And even he was immediately resurrected by Aqua from his remaining ashes. As expected, Aqua's divine magic was truly broken.
"Ahaha, Tae-jin... I'm going to be in your care for a while..."
In the end, everyone decided to stay at our house while the mansion was being repaired. It seems Kazuma and the others had to spend all the money they had saved so far on the repairs. And because of that rampage, Megumin gained the alias 'The Mad Widow'.