Chapter 597 - 598: Pervertedly Poetic

"...No words can express how beautiful you are. Your radiance is like the sun. No other woman compares..."

Damon nonchalantly read from a long piece of paper, glancing at Lilith, who was clearly enjoying his misery.

Iris and Luna stood at his side, obviously the authors of these words. Words Damon would never be caught dead saying on his own.

"Go on. Go ahead," Iris whispered impatiently.

Damon sighed and looked back down at the paper.

"All women are second class before your magnificent beauty..."

He stopped, glancing at the two of them.

"This is the seventh time I’ve said the word ’beauty’ on this page alone. Don’t you girls have anything more original?"

Luna shrugged after exchanging a look with Iris.

"What? We don’t know how to woo a woman. Since you’re such an expert, why don’t you put Lilith in a good mood yourself?"

Damon gave them a flat look, then glanced briefly at Lilith before turning back to them.

"I prefer action over pointless words."

With a soft sigh, he looked up at the sky, which was already beginning to darken. The full moon would rise in just a few hours.

"Since you girls have had your fun, let’s have dinner and then head to bed, all right?"

Iris nodded, feeling tired from her training.

But Luna tightened her grip on Damon’s arm.

"Wait... wait! Don’t try to brush this off. Which woman’s scent did you come back with? I want to know that homewrecker’s name."

She waved her arms around dramatically before glancing at Lilith.

"Say something!"

Lilith sighed and rubbed her forehead.

"It’s fine. I don’t mind."

Luna turned back to Damon with a frown.

"I do. I do mind. Who is it? I just want to know."

Damon noticed the sparkle in her eyes. She wasn’t just doing this for Lilith’s sake—she wanted gossip. From her expression, Damon knew this was one of those times when she would win.

If he refused, she would pout, tell him to stop being stubborn, and eventually he would cave.

"Hah... fine. I’ll talk, but you won’t believe me."

Lilith tilted her head, frowning. Iris sat down in a chair, surprisingly interested as well.

Damon bit his lip. Why had he thought a bunch of girls wouldn’t be interested in this kind of nonsense?

"It’s no big deal. I just met this woman in my travels."

Lilith narrowed her eyes.

"And this woman doesn’t have a name?"

Damon gritted his teeth.

"I was getting there..."

He cleared his throat, looking at them with an awkward smile.

"This woman happens to be someone really high up in society."

Iris glanced at Lilith. As a grand duchess, how much higher could another woman even be?

"You already have a sugar mommy, and you went ahead and got another one?"

Her muttering made Lilith’s face redden slightly, though Iris didn’t seem to realize what she had just implied.

"Hmmm," Damon rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"I wouldn’t call her my sugar mommy, but she did agree to give me five billion zeni."

Iris rolled her eyes.

"Right. Next you’ll say she’s the empress or maybe even the princess."

Damon shook his head.

"Of course not. The empress is a married woman. I draw the line at someone’s wife."

Lilith sneered, recalling how Damon had been messing around with a widow.

"Right. We should thank the goddess for your morality. You would never be caught with your hands on an old widow."

Damon raised his hand to stop her.

"I never said anything about a widow. Don’t put words in my mouth."

"Besides she wasn’t that old.." he muttered softly.

Luna lowered her head in a bow to the others.

"I’m sorry my brother is like this. I swear he used to be a good person."

Damon scoffed. This was too easy. He had managed to divert the conversation.

But Luna wasn’t letting him escape.

"You’re not slick, dear brother. What’s the woman’s name? Her description, age, and location."

Damon’s expression darkened. His sister had become far too sharp at reading him.

"When did you get so sly? You weren’t like this before... who corrupted you?"

Lilith raised her hand.

"Don’t even look at me. You’ve been her role model longer than I have."

Iris slammed her hand on the table.

"Enough. Tell us. The anticipation is killing me."

Damon sighed in resignation. There was no way out. If he refused, they wouldn’t let him go. If he lied, they would catch him.

"Alright. She’s a woman... in terms of looks, I’d say she’s similar to Lilith but gives off a more adult feel. You know... she’s slightly bigger in some areas, like a fruit that’s been ripened for quite a while, but all the other kids can’t climb high enough to reach it..."

Damon closed his eyes as he described her, lost in thought. He completely missed the disgusted looks on their faces.

Iris glanced at Luna, who had buried her face in her palms.

"Vocabulary of a pervert..." she muttered.

Damon opened his eyes and cleared his throat.

"She’s in the capital... at least I think she is."

Lilith smirked, her irritation faint but present.

"Oh really? And who is this fruit of yours? The one that’s too ripe and too far to pick because everyone else can’t climb that high?"

Damon bit his lip. Luna was already on the verge of tears.

"I’ve never heard something so poetically perverted..." she whispered.

Damon groaned. He couldn’t win. Not here. Fighting Ashcroft was easier than this. He just wanted the torture to end.

"Alright Lilith, you win. I admit it. You won. Just put me out of my misery..."

He leaned back in his chair with a sigh.

"An upright hero like me has been reduced to a common pervert..."

Lilith smiled, enjoying his surrender. He had a soft spot for the three girls, so letting them win wasn’t too much of a loss.

"Alright then. How about we let Damon off if he tells us her name? The fruit, I mean."

Damon looked up, only to find all three of them staring at him, waiting. He felt like some poor husband being interrogated by his wife and her sisters-in-law.

"It’s Abellona. Abellona of Valtheron. You know... the third princess of Valtheron."

The three of them exchanged glances, then sighed together.

"This bastard really can’t tell the truth to save his own life..."

Lilith stood up, giving up on him. The other two shook their heads in disappointment.

"And to think we were going to forgive you..."

"...."

Damon was left speechless.

"Arrgh... I... I..."

He was telling the truth. He really was. And yet they didn’t believe him.

"I’m telling the truth, dammit!"