At a certain moment, Xianchan looked up towards the horizon, a hint of "Xianchan style" contemplation appeared in his pupils, and then he turned and left.
Xue Ya stepped onto the Dao Platform, landing beside Fan Wubing without disturbing the tranquility of the night.
Looking at the man curled up on the ground, a trace of heartache flashed through her eyes. She bent down and took the man away.
...
When Fan Wubing opened his eyes, he saw a pair of plump, rounded Beauty Peaks. He realized he was lying in a womanâs embrace. The scent on the woman was pleasant, making him feel secure and relaxed.
He sat up, looked around, and saw it was all ocean. The Immortal Fishing Boat in view was only as small as a peanut.
This was Xue Yaâs Dao Platform.
Xue Ya said, "I saw you seemed to have fainted in the corridor of that boat. Are you in a lot of pain?"
Fan Wubing looked at Xue Ya. Her appearance had changed; not like before in her Daoist Nun guise, so free and unrestrained; she now exuded maturity and intellect, elegance and gentleness, releasing the charm of femininity to the fullest. Especially those bare feet in the moonlight, reflecting a silvery glow, with slightly taut arches and ankles highlighting veins and tendons, the vermillion nail covers made the instep white yet not greasy, having the finishing touch of beauty.
Fan Wubing averted his eyes and softly said, "Sorry for making a fool of myself."
Xue Ya chuckled lightly, "Didnât we say earlier, that when we meet again, weâd say everything we wanted to say together."
"But I donât know what to say anymore." Fan Wubing was somewhat bewildered. Having nothing to do for the moment, he found he couldnât even calm his mind.
Xue Yaâs voice became gentle and slow, "Just speak out the troubles that leave you at a loss."
Fan Wubing shook his head, "Itâs all bitterness. How can I pour out my woes to the Celestial Venerable Youxuan?"
"You carry burdens you cannot unload. This likely became unbearably heavy when you lost your mother," Xue Ya touched a soft spot in Fan Wubingâs heart, "You must have many things youâd like to say to her, right?"
Fan Wubing lowered his gaze, "No matter how much I have to say, thereâs no chance to say them."
"Have you noticed when you started falling into this distress?" Xue Ya asked.
Her eyes were like a tranquil moonlit lake.
Fan Wubing had turned into a wild rabbit that only dared to come out at night to drink water.
"Distress..." He recalled the past.
Xue Ya continued, "You came to the Changsheng Continent, to this ocean, to find your senior sister. But why did she leave you? Something is hidden in your heart, drawing ever closer. And when you realize it, the distress comes."
Fan Wubingâs heart trembled.
He realized that he was too doctrinal, too compliant, stuck in a dead-end. Always believing that the Ying Huo devouring was a five-year affair, a negative effect brought by the Heavenly Deficient Constitution. Yet, when he became aware that he must face the Ying Huo devouring, it was already "gnawing" on him.
How could Ying Huo devouring possibly be merely physical harm?
The will was being devastated,
emotions were being tormented.
Thus, even when facing the brink of life and death before, he had never feared facing anxiety lost self, just seeing the fiery anomaly in the sky began to make him highly anxious.
It was terrifying!
Anxiety and fear can kill,
possibly even before the true Ying Huo devouring arrives, kill oneself.
Not to mention that in past lives many found the pressure unbearable and chose to end it, even in this Cultivation Realm where anything is possible, there is constantly someone doubting themselves, going awry, self-immolating, and ending themselves.
Blades of light swept past Fan Wubingâs back.
So, the Ying Huo devouring had long begun! It invisibly applied psychological pressure on him, just waiting for that day to arrive and instantly collapse him!
Realizing this, he slightly relaxed his brows, looking at Xue Ya with a gentle gaze, "Thank you Celestial Venerable Youxuan for your guidance."
Xue Ya smiled warmly, "Youâre truly quick to understand."
She was always exuding a mature charm, like a ripe fruit, waiting to be picked.
"Itâs the Celestial Venerable Youxuan who spoke whatâs on my mind," Fan Wubingâs eyes held a trace of affection. He rarely, somewhat blushingly asked, "Can I... can I lie beside you?"
Xue Ya was suddenly stunned... this isnât right. Something isnât right.
"Sure."
Fan Wubing lay beside Xue Ya, inhaling the relaxing scent from her body.
He closed his eyes and softly said, "Does the Celestial Venerable Youxuan always do this?"
"Do what?"
"Being so gentle to people."
"Only to you." Xue Ya said, and seeing Fan Wubingâs expression, she repeated in her heart, this isnât right, this isnât right...
Fan Wubing smiled slightly with his eyes closed, "Why? Weâve just known each other for a short while."
"Time cannot measure everything. There is something that transcends time and space."
Fan Wubing opened his eyes and curiously asked, "What is it?"
The word "love" reached Xue Yaâs lips but she couldnât say it. Seeing Fan Wubing, she saw a kind of innocence on his face, a simplicity, a most pure yearning for beauty.
"Itâs... compassion." Xue Ya suddenly felt a bit dejected, "Like seeing a flower not blooming in its most beautiful form, compassion."
Fan Wubing laughed, "I feel like the Celestial Venerable Youxuan is a bit like my senior sister. Although sheâs very gentle, sheâs a bit naĂŻve, unable to say such interesting things."
"Do you like your senior sister?"
"I do," Fan Wubing replied, "She treats me well. I like her very much."
Such unadorned words as if really expressing Fan Wubingâs feelings for his senior sister.
Xue Ya slightly inhaled. Suddenly she realized she was mistaken... she was playing the role of a "mother plus senior sister," receiving from Fan Wubing not desire, but pure love.
This was wrong.
This wasnât what she wanted.
Xue Ya realized she should leave him immediately because she never intended to touch true love.
Since she entered the cultivation path, free and uninhibited, whenever she took a fancy to someone, she never held back.
If she liked, she pursued. It fitted her uninhibited, free spirit.
She never loved anyone and never let anyone love her. Because love represents bondage, it should never appear on someone cultivating the philosophy of "uninhibited spirit". She just fancied Fan Wubing, wanting to extract a respite from desire from this man.
She prepared meticulously, dressing according to his preferences.
She confidently believed she could perfectly tread on his soft spot.
She expected it to be a joyful night.
She was sure that after this night, she would still be the uninhibited Xue Youxuan, and this man would continue on his path. Then when another need arose, they would meet again, finding a uniquely flavored pleasure.
But, she realized, she was wrong.
This man had no desire for her
at all!
His love was so purely terrifying, it was a projection of lost maternal love, and the sunk "senior sister-brother love"!
Xue Ya found it hard to catch her breath.
Fan Wubing asked, "Whatâs wrong with the Celestial Venerable Youxuan?"
Xue Ya forced a smile and asked, "What kind of woman was your mother?"
Fan Wubing said, "Very gentle, she would smile whenever she saw me, always holding me in her arms, just like the Celestial Venerable Youxuan does."
Xue Yaâs face suddenly paled. She wanted to escape, but seeing the lightness and beauty in Fan Wubingâs eyes... she realized that if she left, she would only add to his distress.
She had never been "loved" like this.
Fan Wubing suddenly smiled and asked, "Can I call you Sister Youxuan? It sounds so cool!"
Xue Ya wanted to refuse, but looking into Fan Wubingâs eyes, she trembled and said:
"Alright."
In a daze, she realized her Dao heart was breaking.
Her entire uninhibited spirit had vanished without a trace.
She abruptly realized,
Fan Wubingâs love for his senior sister wasnât love; she had been fooled by him!
The terrifying part was that Fan Wubing might not even know he had fooled her.
The next day, Xue Ya returned to Wangxian Pavilion in disarray.
She ran into He Youyi, who had come to Wangxian Pavilion to find Primordial Transformation Celestial Venerable.
He Youyi looked at her with surprise, "What happened with the Celestial Venerable Youxuan?"
Xue Ya gave a wry smile, "Itâs nothing."
"Did you go to find Fan Wubing?"
She remained silent.
He Youyi sighed, "You all really underestimated that child."
Xue Ya wanted to say itâs not what you think, but she couldnât get the words out, only managing a bitter smile.