Chapter 351: Jasmine and Azriel

Azriel’s lips twitched at her words, but the sight of her tear-bright eyes struck something raw in his chest.

"Just what are you talking about? Hate myself? When did I ever say that...?"

He swung his legs off the bed and stood, facing her with a confused, complicated look.

"...Are you seriously going to pretend?"

"Pretend what, exactly?"

He didn’t understand.

Wasn’t she being unreasonable—suddenly assuming something like that about him? When had he ever given the impression that he hated himself?

Yet Jasmine’s eyes held so much hurt that Azriel felt, absurdly, as if he were the one in the wrong. Why did she look like that?

She answered mournfully, as if forcing stones through her throat. Her voice was so soft it might have been blown to him on a draft.

"...That you want to die."

"—!"

His eyes flew wide. The words knocked the air from his lungs.

"I don’t understand... I don’t understand what you’re saying, Jasmine."

He couldn’t raise his voice. But Jasmine paled, as if he’d confessed to something worse than murder.

It was strange—his body felt heavy as lead; his heart hammered; nerves skittered under his skin. He was anxious. He was afraid.

And there was no god here. No divine spirit. No enemy.

Only him and Jasmine.

"I... I admit I was reckless," Azriel said.

"Like picking a fight with Corven instead of coming straight here. But what happened in the Forest of Eternity—I truly had no choice, Jasmine. I don’t hate myself. I don’t want to die. Everything I’ve been doing—every single thing—since I came back to you, mom, and dad was so I could stay alive. So I could be here with you now, and tomorrow."

Her expression didn’t change. Her tears didn’t stop.

The way she looked at him—those eyes—pulled up a dark memory Leo had tried to bury...

———"Tell me, Leo... how could you lie to us like that?"

"Tell me, Azriel... how could you lie to me like that?"

’

Oh...’

So that was it.

That look.

...The one Leo had created.

"When he told me what he told me, I thought he was lying. It couldn’t be true. And yet—knowing you, Azriel—I couldn’t help doubting. I kept telling myself I just needed time to talk to you, to prove my doubt was stupid. But then you and I met, and we’ve barely had a day to speak properly, and you’ve proven me so wrong, Azriel. You don’t hate yourself? You don’t want to die? Lies. It’s all lies. That’s what you do. That’s what you’ve always done. You summoned that... that devil—or god—whatever he was. Then there’s another one,

Pollux

, just as bad. You went to fight Corven. You killed that woman in the Forest of Eternity. You consumed her mana core. You... you have Mana Core Syndrome. At the containment facility—I know—I know you almost died there as well. Or how about the coma after that ritual with a Leviathan ranked tree? Escaping Neo Genesis wasn’t enough; it cost you your life once already, to the point the God of Death pitied you—and you still wanted more. You wanted revenge. You sacrificed your hand. You sacrificed innocents. You nearly sacrificed yourself again. You surround yourself with people who could kill you for one wrong word—Saint Solomon, ’the Clown,’ a man with literally no heart; the Headmistress, Saint Freya, who would gladly sacrifice anyone for anything she pleases..."

Azriel had no words. Jasmine tried to smile; the last of her tears were drying on her cheeks, but the smile broke as soon as it formed.

"Yet you still claim you don’t want to die? Everything I just said sounds like someone who doesn’t value his life at all. Because let’s face it, little brother—who put you in these situations? You summoned that Lucifer being. You went to Corven. You chose to kill that woman and consume her core knowing the risks. You sought out the Leviathan and performed that ritual that put you in a coma. You planned your revenge on Neo Genesis. You’re the one who got into bed with Solomon and Freya. And... and you’re the one who... who decided to go to that military base that day—knowing you would die..!"

She sobbed again; fresh tears slipped free.

"Ah..."

Azriel made a sound, then closed his mouth. He turned his head away in shame, unable to meet her eyes.

"Your... reaction... so Lioren... was telling the... truth."

...Lioren had told Jasmine the truth.

Azriel wanted to rebut her, to snap his head up and say she was wrong—but his body betrayed him. He couldn’t move. All he felt was shame. Shame, shame and more shame.

"It’s strange," she said softly.

"One moment you’re happy, then lazy, then suddenly crazy, then angry, then suddenly sad—like someone whose emotions don’t line up. But... I’ve never seen this look on you before, little brother."

At last, Azriel managed to lift his head a fraction.

She was smiling now—smiling through tears. It wasn’t a happy smile. It was the saddest thing he’d ever seen.

He forced the words out, words that were barely above a whisper.

"...You’re right. That day... I knew. I knew what would happen."

Her hardworking smile fell.

There was a barrier over this room—an invisible ward Master Felix had set—so no one outside could hear a word. Including Master Felix himself.

"...A week before I disappeared," Azriel said, "Lioren came to me in secret. He brought a message from the Oracle—what would happen if I chose to go to the military base with Dad."

Though she already knew what Lioren had said, Jasmine still went pale, stunned, as if only when Azriel spoke it aloud did it become—

Real.

The Oracle was as celebrated as the Saintess among the Ten Heavenly Churches, and far more mysterious. Hidden. Guarded. Some called the Oracle a messenger of the gods; others claimed the Oracle could see the definitive future, or held all divine knowledge—or wasn’t human at all.

Whatever the truth, one thing was certain:

The Oracle speaks, and what the Oracle says comes to pass.

Sometimes years pass before anyone hears those words. Yet the Oracle had reached Lioren in secret—and Lioren had carried them to Azriel:

"On the seventh rise of the sun, the moon shall weep, and the sun shall bear witness to the world’s cruelty. Death will watch in silence. Time shall hold its breath. Fate will flee. The threads shall sever, the cogs shall crumble. Fear will reign, and neither man nor beast shall save the young Prince of Crimson from the loss of his life and his home."

Azriel repeated the prophecy exactly—Oracle to Lioren, Lioren to him.

On the very day he was meant to die, Lioren came again and offered his help.

And Azriel refused.

Recalling it all, remembering it all—a memory Azriel had been unconsciously suppressing.

The way she looked at him—those eyes—pulled up a dark memory Azriel had tried to bury...

"Why...?" Jasmine whispered.

Why would Azriel go there, knowing he was going to die?

Once more, Azriel couldn’t bear to look at her. He turned his face away.

"Because... I made a bet with Lioren."

"What?"

"...A bet that I wouldn’t die. That Dad would save me."

A bet.

...One both Lioren and Azriel had lost.

"Dad? Dad saving you—that was the bet?"

Small ripples of mana shivered through the air. The corners and edges of the furniture began to smolder.

"You’re telling me the... the suffering I’ve endured for two... two years was because you and Lioren made a...

bet

?"

Azriel said nothing.

"Answer me, Azriel!"

She shouted, and the flames leapt higher. Azriel flinched and pressed his lips together.

Jasmine clenched her fists until her nails bit skin; blood dotted the floorboards—already cracked by the aftershocks of Lucifer’s visit—and seeped into the seams.

"I hate them..." Her voice was quiet and hoarse.

"I hate—hate Mom and Dad. Because... because of you, you know!?"

Azriel looked at her again—this time, surprised, shocked by her words.

"They never cared! They were there, sure—they pretended—but they never cared! They never cared about you, Azriel! When you were alive, tell me once—just once—when they stood up for you!? They weren’t there when you spoke your first words. They weren’t there when you took your first steps. They were there only when you and I got our talents measured! And after that? They were gone! Because they didn’t care!"

Her tears fell hot, and the room burned with them. Curtains curled into black petals. Smoke gathered in the ceiling’s corners. Azriel stood in the center of it, his eyes trembling, his heart shaking.

"And when you—when you were supposed to be dead, I hated them even more! How dare they... how dare they act like grieving parents when they never gave a damn about you before! It was too late! Too late to start caring! Too late to cry for you!"

...It hurt.

All of it hurt.

"And yet—for those people—why? Why did you gamble away your life for someone as awful as Dad? You left me... The only person who cared about you. No one ordered me to be there. No one forced me. But I was there. I was always there. And y-you still left me. You gave your life without even a thought for me! You left me alone with them! You weren’t there, so you left me alone..!"

Jasmine cried. She didn’t try to stop it. The flames reached for Azriel’s skin and tried to bite, yet even as the motes settled on him they did not mark him. The fire inside him burned hotter than the blaze outside—hotter and crueler. It burned, and it hurt, so, so much.

"I... I hate you...!"

Her voice cracked like something broken. She turned and ran for the door.

It was that day again. That night. That look she gave him before she left the apartment. The last time he saw her.

A day he regrets still, and will for the rest of his li—

"WAIT!"

His hand closed around her arm. Jasmine startled and turned. Azriel held on with both hands, head bowed.

"Don’t..."

There were sobs—but they weren’t Jasmine’s.

"Please..."

There were tears—but they weren’t Jasmine’s.

"...Don’t go..."

There was a small, broken voice, filled with fear—but it wasn’t Jasmine’s.

He lifted his head at last.

Jasmine stood frozen, unable to move, unable even to blink.

When she saw him crying, her tears returned.

"...I’ll tell you," he whispered.

"I’ll tell you

everything

. So please... don’t go. Please... don’t hate me..."