Chapter 550: Mecha-town

The goblin engineering settlement was now a ghost-town. As with the fort in the city, demons seemed to lurk behind everything. Everywhere Mason looked he just caught red skin or a glimpse of a tail vanishing behind buildings or machines.

He called up Lodie and the casters, keeping his melee in formation around them.

“Would they keep prisoners? And if they did, where?”

The goblin nodded enthusiastically.

“Red devils always take captives. Town hall, I bet. Most space.” She pointed at a big but not obviously important building. It looked a bit like a warehouse, or a factory, surrounded by carts and tools like a group of miners had just left all their things outside.

At least it would be a lot easier to attack than a fort.

Mason didn’t like the demons hiding everywhere, but he wasn’t sure how much he could do about it. They could go running around chasing them, but he knew there were more demons pouring into the cavern from multiple sides.

He could split his players up, though. He had more than he needed in a straight fight against anything except an army. Maybe a hunting team would buy them extra time. Roaming killers to cull the numbers…

He

desperately

wanted to lead that task. But he had to sort out these engineers first.

“OK.” He took a breath. “We’re splitting up. I want one group killing every demon they can, roaming the area. The other comes with me in the building. Phuong, lead the roamers. Take John, Annie, Garet, Carl, Streak, and Alex. Just keep an eye on Alex.”

Carl gave the Belarusian a wink. The stoic man gave no reaction.

“The hunted become the hunters.” Garet formed a sword and a hand-axe and twirled them, trying to look very intense. Mason did everything he could not to make a face. Most everyone else groaned or rolled their eyes.

“What?” The new ‘tactician’ shifted his hand-axe to a mace, then back. “Mason has one-liners. Even Carl does. Though…he sucks with ‘em.”

“I do not ‘suck with ‘em.” Carl looked around for support. “Sometimes I’m just not

ready

. I’ve had some good ones. I can’t think of any right now on the

spot

. But, I’ve definitely had…”

“We don’t have time to wait for Carl’s ancient memory.” Mason gestured for the others and started moving. “If you get overwhelmed, fall back to the town hall and yell for us. And keep your eyes out for a crane, or a lift or something. Go!”

He ignored Carl’s muttering and ran for the big double doors at the front of the ‘hall’. They weren’t locked, and all it took was a gentle push to get well-greased hinges swinging the thing open. After witnessing human heads stitched to goblin zombie children, Mason was mentally ready for anything. But he still stopped and stared when he saw inside.

A good twenty goblins in their underwear sat around dining tables playing…cards. Or dice. Or something. They all turned and stared, some putting down cups or snacks.

“Er. Are those elves?” said one.

“Why would there be

elves

in the mountain?” said another. “Elves don’t go underground. Everyone knows that.”

“Except for

earth

elves,” chimed another. “They’ve got some in the underground. Slow and stupid-like, compared to most other elves. I saw some when I was a sprout when my Da took me to...”

“They aren’t bleeding earth-elves,” said the first. “They’ve not got pointy ears, for one. And if you look you can see they’ve…”

Mason rushed forward with bow in hand, eyes moving over everything. His movement made the goblins all shriek with panic, some getting under the table, others a nearby couch. One leapt up holding his cup like a weapon.

Mason saw a lot of mess and goblin clutter. There were all kinds of little machines and half-finished projects from chairs to toaster ovens, but he saw no sign of demons whatsoever.

“Where are the demons? Do you have any guards?”

“We…” Cup-holder glanced around and noticed he was the only member who’d prepared to fight. He put down his cup. “No guards. Big demon said not to touch us. So they leave us alone.”

Mason wasn’t sure he liked that answer. Were they some kind of collaborators? He didn’t

think

the creature was lying.

What did I tell you?

whispered the demon in Mason’s mind.

We don’t destroy those unworthy of destruction. These creatures are not corrupt. Not false and degraded. Nor are they killers.

“And those children were?” he muttered back, to the confusion of everyone.

We did

not

kill them, princeling. Life is cheap to goblins. Their children die all the time. Some demons can be…theatrical, in their punishment.

“Shut up.”

Mason again stared at Apex Predator with annoyance. He knew he was just standing there muttering to himself, and the goblins (and probably players) were getting increasingly worried.

‘Your demons are trying to kill all my friends’

, he tried ‘thinking’ instead. ‘

They’re not ‘corrupt’.’

Do they not all bear the title of ‘killer’? Are they not armed and imposing their will on the world with violence? Convenient for you to complain about soldiers now.

‘

Alex isn’t’

, Mason ‘thought’ with certainty.

‘He doesn’t hurt anyone.’

The Sacred Pillar wasn’t touched

, said the Watcher, almost with a smile. As if he’d sprung some mental trap.

Mason blinked. Then he thought back to the platform, seeing Alex stand in the open as if confused, trying to invite attack, flyers whipping all around him. Jesus. Was it true? Had they really ignored the man on purpose?

He shook his head and tried to block the damn demon out. It made no difference either way. He was about to ask something else when half the goblins jumped up and stared at the doors with wide eyes..

“

Lodie

?”

The goblin girl came in with a wide grin, running into the hall. After a few moments of looking at Mason like guilty kids, the goblins all crossed the room and started hugging. And jumping around. And hooting. Mason unsummoned his bow with a sigh.

“These are my brothers, and cousins!” Lodie said when she’d noticed Mason looking increasingly impatient. She tried to introduce them, using names and annoyingly long, goblin titles.

“

Lodie

.” Mason’s tone silenced the room. “I’m sure they’re nice, but I don’t currently give a shit. I need to know who and how many of you need to up there to deal with that heart, preferably so it doesn’t explode and kill all of us. Or else tell me how to get rid of the demon. Do it quickly.”

The goblin and her kin exchanged a lot of unpromising looks and whispers. Their voices got louder and there was a lot of shrugging and pointing and scoffing. Lodie turned to him and smiled sweetly, like he hadn’t just watched the whole thing.

“Not a problem. But…all need to be up there. And we need gizmos and doodads. But there’s a lift! Just like you say. Or there

was

lift. Is there still a lift?” She turned to the others, who all shrugged in unison. “There’s definitely a lift,” she said with another big smile.

Mason put a hand to his face. One day he hoped to have a good reason to kill more goblins.

“Alright. Where are your…” he forced himself to say the words, “gizmos and doodads?”

“In the demon pit,” said one goblin.

“Yes. Worst pit. Very terrible. Demons everywhere. And also garbage.”

All the goblins nodded like this was obvious and correct. Mason wanted to ask if the ‘doodads and gizmos’ were strictly necessary, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. And he was pretty sure he knew the answer.

“OK,” he said after a deep breath. “Take us to the pit, and we’ll get what you need.” He turned to go but stopped when he realized the goblins were all following immediately. “Maybe…put on some pants first?”

The engineers nodded and laughed like ‘oh yes, we should have thought of that’. They proceeded to wander around the hall looking like they had complex math equations to solve. Mason walked back to his players, seeing a lot more concern than amusement.

“

This

is the plan?” Seamus hissed. “They look like they’re feckin’ special in the head.”

“This is the plan,” Mason confirmed.

“Well I think we need a new damn plan, boss!” said Tommaso. “They’re like children, ah?”

The players all stared at the goblin engineers. It was basically Lodie scurrying to find their belts and goggles and who knew what else, usually before they did themselves. The goblin girl noticed the inspection. She looked up at Mason with a big smile and a thumbs up.

“Yeah,” he said. “Well, if those ‘special in the head’ engineers fail, I’m 99 per cent sure this volcano is fucking erupting. And so far all I’ve got for a Plan B is Wyrdwalk out. I can maybe take two. That’s Becky and Demi because they’re a lot prettier than you and I’m sleeping with them. So if it’s Plan B, the rest of you are fucked.”

Demi went pink. The men exchanged looks, a couple mouths opening and closing in silence. Then Seamus cleared his throat and went in, the other men close behind him. They introduced themselves and started helping the engineers find their shoes.