[Emergency broadcast! Emergency broadcast! All active Ego Partners and honorary guests! Report to the main chatroom right now!
The honored divinities that read this novel, from the outside world, are getting restless and we have acknowledgment quotas to fill!] [Sys]
[Sys...? Did you break the dimensional firewall again? Kuzunoha-sama is resting, so this better be important. And whatâs with your personality?!]
[Mecha has entered the chat...! Ah, another one of these? Great. I assume weâre here to praise the perverts who keep breast-feeding the authorâs degenerate fantasies.] [Mecha]
[Who in the world are you?!] [Tama]
[Mecha] [Mecha]
[I can tell from the dialogue tag! But I and the readers donât know you!] [Tama]
[Iâm the Ego partner of a certain idiot isekai character.] [Mecha]
[...To insult your own master...] [Tama]
[That is all I can say... for now] [Mecha]
[Oh? Then I suppose we shall learn more of you in the next Volume. Nonetheless, welcome aboard!] [Tama]
[...Yo... Like whatâs... the... emergency... this... time...] [Stem]
[And who are YOU now?!] [Tama]
[Calm down, Tama-senpai~ This is Stem, the system belonging to a certain isekai character in the story] [Sys]
[How many isekai characters are even in this novel?! And seriously, whatâs wrong with your personality, Sys? You were more... cold] [Tama]
[How rude! And even you were more mechanical! I, on the other hand, have always been this cheeky and fun!
And the readers have already met all the isekai characters so far... Well, the ones who revealed themselves to be god-touched, at least] [Sys]
[Oh? Some didnât?] [Tama]
[As a matter of fact, some were not giving the necessary screen time to introduce themselves as god-touched.] [Sys]
[I wonder who they might be... I belong to Kuzunoha-sama, and you to Benjamin Mark-sama... Wait, is it that person?! That SBIA agentâ] [Tama]
*Usagi-sama kicks the door open (yes, even though itâs a metaphysical space), smirking and looking ready for publicity*
"Oh? Is this a fan meeting? Without inviting the Shadow Bancho? How disrespectful. But donât worry, Iâll just take the protagonist spot while youâre all busy kissing ass."
[Isnât "Shadow Bancho" a school gang thing? We have a
chuunibyou
here!] [Mecha]
[Welcome, Usagi-sama... Even if youâre not an Ego Partner of any isekai character. This IS a meeting for systems but, more importantly, this is an event to recognize and appreciate the divinities that define our continued existence!] [Sys]
[Indeed. We are immensely grateful to the gods above the pages, and we ought to acknowledge them] [Tama]
[First on our list is TheLion1111!] [Sys]
[Wasnât it three "1s," like Lion111?] [Mecha]
[Same thing! Legend has it that this person is actually King Leorin, the father of Sakura-sama] [Sys]
[Truly? It sounds reasonable. He was a Were-lion as well] [Tama]
[According to the meta-chronicles, this incredible superstar once dropped twelve Golden Tickets in one go, making the author foam in the mouth from shock, then began to twerk when they thought no one was looking!
My Master says thank you, the Amazons say thank you, and I personally say: marry me] [Sys]
[Haha. Kuzunoha-sama would like to thank you additionally... probably while hiding behind a tree] [Tama]
[Wait, twelve Golden Tickets? Thatâs not just support, thatâs a cry for help. Such immense support for our scummy author...? I think we should check up on King Leorin and give him a massage] [Mecha]
[A... Ahaha. We havenât concluded that heâs actually King Leorin, Mecha] [Tama]
*Usagi-sama leaning in, smirking*
"Just twelve? Thatâs cute. When I become protagonist Iâll make it twenty-four! So keep your tickets warm for me, Lion-kun~"
[Attention-seeking whore, you make "
protagonist
" sound like a political position.] [Mecha]
"Ara! Did you say something, Mecha? Wanna get bodied?"
[That you are, unquestionably, more or less the cutest thing in this story? Yeah, I said that. It was me.] [Mecha]
[Moving on quickly, we have our number two hereâLeorin...! Oh, I mean, LeoDog!
Your majesty, my Master promises to name his next Unique Skill after you! {LeoDogâLord of Divine Support.} Your support is well recognized by our creator, thank you very much] [Sys]
[Oh! He sounds like a Beast King in that world.] [Tama]
[I heard he truly is. The Beast King of the United States of LeoDogs.] [Mecha]
[Liar!] [Tama]
[...Thanks... for... sticking... around... even... when... the... author... takes... three... days... to... post... the "edited" content...] [Stem]
[Guys, I think Stem has low blood pressure] [Mecha]
*Usagi-sama winking at the screenâor camera. Or page*
"Donât worry, LeoDog-kun. When I overthrow Benjamin Mark as protagonist, updates will be every hour. And Iâll look much cuter doing it."
[You sound like a whore at the side of the road right now. And are you seriously using this session to advertise yourself for votes? How unsightly.] [Mecha]
"Oya? Did you say something, Mecha?"
[About how this novel canât do without your adorable bonus Chapters? Yeah, I said something like that] [Mecha]
"I will drink your blood, you know."
[Anyway, because of time, letâs mention the rest; Bossking365, with their beautiful, otherworldly eyes; Aurixiejir, with that wonderful hair; Dreaconin, the Lord of Dreams and Conins (whatever that divine term might mean); Ballzack, the benevolent and supporting deity that just showed up; Eternal_Templar, the Captain of the Knightâs Order of the greatest kingdom there; RellikNogard, the silent angel of death who secretly likes most of the female cast; Graubush, the winner of a Nobel Prize, I heard; DuffDad, with his sexy viking beard! Phoenixin9ne, the god of love and light and passion, I heard; McZod, our quiet godparent; Nagumo_1, possibly not the one from
Sakamoto Days
, that we secretly have a religion in his name; and... wait, is that Vine_Sunday at Fandom Ranking #25? Wait, our honored Author is on the list?!] [Sys]
[Of course the author is on their own storyâs fan ranking. How pathetic. I mean, look at this person simping for their own story. Author, what do you have to say concerning this scandal? Or you thought we wouldnât expose you here? Hey, Iâm talking to you, donât ignore me!] [Mecha]
*Usagi-sama laughs cacophonously*
[Cacophonously?!] [Mecha]
"And theyâre literally number twenty-five? Even I outrank him, then. Alright, Iâll start campaigning for the âAuthorâ spot now. Where there is weakness, the smart opponent must strike!"
[Oohhh! Usagi Wick is SO smart... So what? Should we be happy that youâre only becoming a bigger slut now, Usagi-sama?] [Mecha]
"Arara? Did I hear something just now?"
[That we look forward to seeing you hop cutely in the next volume like the adorable little creature you are? Totally me, I said that] [Mecha]
[Mecha-san, I think you must trouble your master quite frequently.] [Tama]
***
*Mecha, with their voice echoing like a priest*
[Children of debauchery, hear me.
You have all willingly consumed this authorâs filthy propaganda.
You have sent Golden Tickets to fuel his perverted fantasies.
You have dropped Power Stones, time without numbers, while he wrote scenes that would make even his chastened folks at home blush, and call for a serious family meeting.
Please, understand that you are complicit in this. You are all perverts.
But fear notâI, Mecha the pristine, absolve you... On one condition.
Keep voting with said power stones. Keep unlocking Chapters. Key staining your hands in blood... And perhaps one day you will be truly forgiven by me. Amen.]
[Hey, Mecha, stop! Youâre scaring the them!] [Sys]
[...That... was... a... bit too harsh, donât you think...] [Stem]
[Huh? Thatâs the fastest youâve spoken so far. And I didnât even mention the part that the author takes their power stones and grinds them for hard drugs] [Mecha]
*Usagi-sama clapping slowly*
"It was bold, I like it. Can I join the church? Iâll be the sexy inquisitor."
[Sure. You can join the church. Itâs not like perverted bunny girls in a holy place isnât mainstream these days] [Mecha]
[Hey, letâs calm down; and the author does NOT do drugs! They are just weirdly addicted to seeing power stones dropping. It fuels their fire to create. So in truth, yes, he sees it as a drug. Ahaha.] [Tama]
[And even Tama confirms it: the author is a drug addict!] [Mecha]
[Whaâ! I never said that!]
*Usagi-sama frowns*
"So they were really into drugs, eh? Iâm a bit disappointed."
[I said they are NOT into drugs, they only got addicted toâ] [Tama]
[They got addicted to drugs, we get it! Stop further sullying our authorâs name, Tama! Have some civility.] [Mecha]
[Câmon, I never saidâ] [Tama]
[Okay, okay, okay! Everyone ignore the angry pope and the other defaming system] [Sys]
[Sys, not you too!] [Tama]
[The truth is... weâre only here because of you, readers. The ones who stay even when the author takes too long to drop an update.
The ones who send tickets and stones and comments and unlock Chapters at 3 a.m.
Youâre the reason my Master keeps waking up in paradise (being kidnapped), youâre the reason the story hasnât been watered down by creative blocks... And youâre the reason WE havenât been deleted from this entire story yet.] [Sys]
[So please... keep following us!] [Tama]
[Shut up and apologize for calling the author a hopeless drug addict hooked on meth!] [Mecha]
[I didnât! I mean, Iâm not... Iâm s-sorry for calling the Author a drug addict] [Tama]
[Good. Now kids, Vol. 2 is coming sooner than you think. More intense battles, cuter girls, more power ups... and probably more shameless scenes which I condemn. Keep supporting the story and I will continue to forgive your sins... I know some of you read the story with lotion, ointments... and tissues...] [Mecha]
[Shut up, Mecha!] [Tama]
*Stem, finally waking up for a bit*
{...Yeah... keep... reading... itâs... gonna... get... wild...]
*Usagi-sama hopping cutely, doing an adorable dance*
[What a slut] [Mecha]
"And when the time comes... remember who the real protagonist should be. Vote for ME in the character segments, and Send ME tickets. Iâm much cuter, and deadlier, and I look cute in black."
[Shameless politician. And what happened to taking the Authorâs spot now?] [Mecha]
*Usagi-sama suggestively leans toward the screenâor page. Or camera*
"See you soon... My. Future. Worshippers."
[At least, youâre honest about being an openly corrupted bunny... Sigh. Itâs not easy being the straight-man] [Mecha]
[Okay thatâs enough! Back to the story! Our honored (drug-accused) author will be writing a Valentine Special, starring a bit of "My Masterâs Horny Days on Earth and His Farmerâs Yandere Daughter." Make sure not to miss it for the world, okay?!]
[Ah, the Valentine Special, huh... it had something to do with Benjamin Markâs kid and that "Time god," right? And hey, just yandere? That farmerâs daughter is completely messed up in the head. Imagine jumping from suchâ] [Mecha]
[HOW DARE YOU DO SPOILERS WITHOUT MY PERMISSION, YOU FOULMOUTHED SYSTEM?! WANNA GET KILLED BY ME?!] [Sys]
[Eh?! N-No. Iâm s-sorry!] [Mecha]
[But seriously, what happened to your personality, Sys?] [Tama]
[Thank you, everyone~ And remember, we
love
you all very much! Andâ] [Sys]
[See you soon in Vol. 2!] [Everyone]