Extra 5: Around that time, modern day (3)
If I went outside, my skin would be ruined. In the summer, going outside without a hat caused me to suffer heatstroke in a matter of minutes.
When I walked, I got muscular pain. My legs and loins cramped; I spent every day feeling like a newborn calf or foal. How many times did I imagine how nice it would be to use a wheelchair?
By the time Iād finished eating a meal, I would be covered in sweat. A little while later, I wouldnāt be able to raise my arms properly.
If I watched a comedy show, my abdominal muscles suffered greatly. I couldnāt tell whether the comedy was funny enough to make me cry from laughing, or whether I was crying from the pain.
This was when my younger brother Makoto was young.
I am Misumi Yukiko. Iām Yukiko, born on the 10th of August. I want to question my parentsā naming sense. Though I do think itās better than being named Makoto, born on the 1st of April.
Right now, Iām studying medical science at university. Iām twenty years old, and the first thing I want to do after graduating is to go to a foreign country to improve my skill, but Iām getting fed up with my fatherās vehement opposition to it.
Eventually I want to live in Japan doing pediatrics, but even when I tell my father that, he wonāt hear a word of it.
My mother and younger sister approve, and my younger brother also approved.
Though Makoto left the house suddenly, so I donāt know how much thatās worth.
My father says that this is how a manās family is run as he continuously gets in between me and my future. Damn you, Makoto, why didnāt you predict that things would turn out like this?
I donāt even have any idea where heās gone. Father and Mother wear know-it-all expressions as they tell me that heās fine, but they cry from time to time. I donāt get them.
The one thing I can say for certain is, he will definitely not return before I become a doctor.
That day, the letter addressed to me and my younger sister Mari was written like this⦠It must be nice to be Mari, having a normal name. Iāve secretly thought that she should have been named Misoka-chan, since her birthday is on the 1st of January.
āIām going to go and help Ouoka-sama* in the south. I think it will be fine, but please donāt turn on my PC. When you dispose of it, pour water over it thoroughly just in case, and destroy it using a blunt weapon such as a sledgehammer. Please do whatever you like with the rest of the things in my room. Also, I believe that Onee-san will be able to become a pediatrician. Please do your best. Please treasure brother-in-law-san ā well, he is not my brother-in-law yet. If Mari has any troubles after entering middle school and high school, she should rely on a senpai called Higashi. But donāt go near a senpai called Ibuki. Also, please remember to knock before entering someoneās room. Well then, goodbye.ā
And with that, Makoto disappeared. No, he was already gone.
On that morning, leaving behind nothing but this letter that looks like some kind of joke, he vanished. He hasnāt come back home once, nor has he been in contact at all.
But judging from how my parents say that heās gone to study overseas and the detailed instructions that they gave, I get the feeling that they know something. The strings of Fatherās wallet always loosen easily when one takes advantage of him, but even he closes his mouth as tight as a shellfish when the topic is brought up. Maybe it has something to do with their pasts.
How did they meet, and how did they fall in love? Our parents are such a mystery. They speak fondly of each other, but their story of where they dated and how they met changes every time I ask. I would have thought it wouldnāt really be a problem if your daughter wanted to know the details about your romance. Itās really a mystery.
Also, they say they hate photos and donāt have any from the past, but then why do they have multiple albums of me, Makoto and Mari? Why does a new album titled things like āour familyā appear with every season that passes? They actually love photos way too much!
We donāt have any contact with relatives but, well, thatās fine because itās easier for us. Instead, our parentsā friends visit our house, and we siblings never felt any loneliness at the fact that we donāt have any relatives.
From time to time we had visitors who were clearly from other countries, which made us feel nervous, but now itās something that we look forward to.
Ah, Iām going off-topic.
I was talking about Makotoās letter.
Thereās nothing to be said about his destination or objective. Thatās in the past. Thereās no way a child who would never let his family touch his PC would ask them to get rid of it. He always recommended that I become a sports doctor. He had long since given up on trying to get Mari to remember to knock before entering his room.
Everything about it was strange.
Iām happy that he accepted my choice of going into pediatrics. Though itās a little disappointing that he didnāt do so face to face, but through a letter just before he disappeared.
Iāve told this to my family and close friends, but Makoto is the reason I chose the path of medicine.
He was incredibly frail, and he came down with a fever whenever he did anything. Though there were a lot of times I thought he was a lot of trouble. After all, when I was young, I often had to look after him.
My own body was weaker than most peopleās, but Makotoās weakness completely did away with the complex that I had about it. I was completely fine compared to my younger brother.
I was practically forced to do judo, and I also had to do housework. I think what kept me going was the feeling of wanting to protect him because he was weaker than me, and the fact that he was trying so hard despite that.
In the end, judo became a habit for me. Iām still commuting to university from home, so I still have to do housework. Well, you know, university students have social lives (truly), so I did have (a lot of) things change for me as well.
Right now, Iām able to deal with most of the housework, I have enough of a reputation that professors, senpais, kouhais and people in the same year call out to me, and Iāve progressed in judo to the point that Iām considered one of the higher-ranking light-weight athletes.
Since I have no intention of living my life as an athlete, I havenāt participated in any formal matches since I entered university, nor do I belong to any clubs, but I did take an interview once when I was still in high school.
My body is still weaker than most peopleās, but Iām healthy enough. I just get tired a little more easily.
When I heard about the option of entering medical school from some person who looked like he was from the media, I began to wonder if my body was broken, but thatās not the case.
In reality, the ambition that rose from my feelings of wanting to cure Makoto of his injuries and illnesses hasnāt caused my body any harm.
With that said, he has better stamina than me now and can run around normally. My feelings from when we were young ended as just an excuse for me to go into medicine. That makes me feel a little lonely, but Iām honestly happy about it.
Now that I think about it, Makoto really hated standing in front of the gas stoveās fire and going outside for various martial arts.
⦠He has lots of painful memories of being burnt and having his bones fractured. Now that I think back to it, I was horrible for calling him a weakling.
I wonder when it was.
When was it that the look in his eyes began to change?
Thatās right.
When he came across archery, I suppose. No, maybe around the time Mari became old enough to talk.
Around then, he was really giving everything he had to take even one step forward.
At first, it was impossible to tell whether he was trying to hold his bow or use it as something to lean against.
Iām not exaggerating when I say that one time, Makoto failed to maintain a kneeling position, rolled over and fractured his arm. I wonder why our parents were so intent on having him learn a martial art. I really have no idea.
Well, among all the martial arts, I think archery is one of the calmer ones, but⦠Even so, I thought it would be impossible for Makoto to keep going with it.
He stood, sat, ran, used a rubber bow and studied the forms.
Iām really impressed that he continued learning it. Though Iām looking at it in hindsight, since Makotoās body became healthy, wasnāt it a good thing in the end?
Now that Iām studying medicine, I can say with certainty that it was most definitely not healthy for him, but⦠in the endā¦
Unexpectedly, this is kind of a gray area.
Well, this is something I can take my time and deal with once Makoto comes back.
It doesnāt feel like Iāve been separated from him forever in this life.
Leaving the joke letter aside, this is Makotoās house and we are Makotoās family. Thatās why I believe that thereās no way that Makoto wonāt return to this city, to this house.
Heās someone whoās already made a miracle happen with his own body. No news is good news, mhmm, thatās right.
He hasnāt even introduced his girlfriend to me yet. Itās not fair that Iām the only one whoās introduced my boyfriend to him.
Iāve seen photos from his club activities and events and itās not like thereās no female presence at all. If he takes the time to date someone, theyāll understand just how good a person he is. I think that a girl like that should exist somewhere.
The problem might actually lie in Makoto himself.
Heās still young, but he has hobbies that arenāt suitable for his age.
Would a normal teenager record a historical drama that plays at 10am so he can watch it later? Would he not know the names of any idol groups, but get into heated discussions about supporting actors?
Would he have historical drama DVDs lined up by series name in alphabetical order in a corner of his room? Would the contents of his cellphoneās music player consist of Endless Gypsy Kin and Billy Van*? No, thereās no way. That shouldnāt be the case.
When I was talking to my younger brother about an erotic game, he made an excuse about how itās not that kind of game and that itās a masterpiece. At that time, I was actually relieved.
His notions on the relationship between men and women date back to the Showa Era*, or maybe even before that.
Even if a girl were to confess to him, I donāt think he would nod his head quietly.
Before that, he might misunderstand and put her into the āfamilyā category like me and Mari, or in the āfriendsā category with Ibuki-kun and the others.
⦠I think having friends and companions is a wonderful thing, but thatās different from love. I get the feeling that he probably doesnāt understandā¦
I hope Iām just overthinking things.
ć⦠Hey, Yukiko, your eyes clearly arenāt focused.ć
I wonder if heās ever fallen in love with someone before?
ć⦠Anyone home? If you just keep moving your hands, Iām going to start getting really scared, you know?ć
Would things be different if there was a girl who would teach him about these things more forcefully?
ćNo! Yukiko, you canāt do that! Definitely not allowed!ć
So loud. A person is trying to think here, you⦠know?
ćStop! Really, stop! Youāre too strong for me! Please stop ā !ć
Oh. I forgot what I was doing right now.
ćSorry!ć(Yukiko)
I was almost about to put the tip of a syringe in between the nail and fingertip of my boyfriendās ring finger.
No good, no good.
Iād asked him to help me practice inserting needles so that I can learn to do it in a painless way, and also make sure that I hit blood vessels properly.
Fortunately (?), my boyfriend is the type whose blood vessels donāt float up easily and are hard to find, so it was good practice. And right now, Iām in the middle of that practice.
To think that I would get caught up in my thoughts. I feel sorry for my boyfriend whoās been spending his days getting holes poked in both his arms.
ćI-I was wondering if you changed your mind and decided to torture me instead.ć(Boyfriend)
Since he has no particular experience with physical activities, there was no way for him to break out of my grip. Mhmm, that must have been scary.
ćIām sorry, okay? Letās call it a day here.ć
Yes, and if we donāt leave now, we wonāt have time for our date. Though weāre both university students, we have to set aside time to spend together.
ćWere you thinking about something?ć(Boyfriend)
ćYeah, a little.ć(Yukiko)
ć⦠About Nakatsuhara High School?ć(Boyfriend)
ć⦠?! No, something else. Itās going to be December soon, right? I was just thinking about how fun itās going to be with all the events.ć(Yukiko)
I give a rather vague laugh in response to his concerns. Iāve heard that my brother has nothing to do with the incidents at my former school, anyway. When I was suddenly told things about when he was in middle school and high school, I was really surprised.
ćEven if you say that, weāre really busy in the end, you know? Though I do want to do as much as I can, and I will.ć(Boyfriend)
ćIām looking forward to it.ć(Yukiko)
ćAh, I want to see Makoto-kun again. He was always nice to me and it made me happy, like I had a younger brother. I hope I can see him, even if itās just to wish him a happy new year.ć(Boyfriend)
ćYeah, youāre right. But heās already in his second year of high school; who knows how busy heāll be with his social life? I donāt think New Yearās Day will work, you know?ć(Yukiko)
ćEh, Iāll come to say happy new year and then letās go and do our first visit to the shrine together. Or are you busy on that day?ć(Boyfriend)
ćIām not busy, butā¦ć(Yukiko)
New Yearās Day is bad. I have to protect his wallet, or our New Yearās dates will beā¦
ćIs there something wrong with it?ć(Boyfriend)
ćNew Yearās Day is Mariās birthday. Sheās merciless, so sheāll demand both New Yearās gifts and birthday presents, you know? Sheāll press you for those, calling you Brother-in-law-chan, you know?ć(Yukiko)
ćUghā¦ć(Boyfriend)
ćYouāre an only child so you even fawned over Makoto, do you think you can win against Mari?ć(Yukiko)
Thatās right. My boyfriend is an only child. It seems that he yearns to have siblings.
Thatās why he was always so helpful towards Makoto, and wants to meet him so badly. Apparently he ran into Mari-chan in town one time, and he took her and all of her friends that were with her (I think there were seven or eight of them) to a family restaurant and treated them to a meal. So weak, far too weak!
The reason Makoto was so nice to him was probably because⦠Ever since I got a boyfriend, Makoto didnāt get holes poked in his arms anymore. His blood vessels were exceptionally difficult to find as well.
I get the feeling that Mari really just sees my boyfriend as a Farfetchād*. Itās a problem that he fawns over her despite that, but like Makoto, he does prefer cats over dogs. It doesnāt seem like Iāll be able to correct that. I donāt have a choice but to have Mari restrain herself a little around him.
Iām happy that he likes my brother so much, but I donāt think theyāll be able to meet on New Yearās Day. I feel sorry for lying to him, but I might have to tell him that Makotoās gone overseas to study as well.
I link arms with my boyfriend and feel his warmth, feeling frustrated that I canāt tell him the truth as we walk along the road by the riverbank upon which the setting sun is shining.
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