Chapter 155: Completely Blown Away
"Babybear, todayās livestream is crucial. Make sure you play your role as a punching bag wellādonāt disappoint me."
"Mr. King Shrimp Sniper, I know you donāt respect me, but I expect every blind shot I fire with you to hit the target. Otherwise, Iāll shove your barrel straight into your own scope!"
Chen Huaiāan slung his left arm over the strawberry bear's shoulder while gripping the sniper rifleās barrel with his right hand.
After a round of friendly negotiations, both the bear and the sniper temporarily reached a mutual understanding with him.
"Let me introduce youāthis is Baji and Xiaoqing. Theyāre your new friends. From now on, get along⦠or Iāll personally gut whoever starts trouble."
The toy bear glanced at Baji and Xiaoqing, its big round eyes flashing darkly.
These two must be important to Subject 0⦠If I kill them, heāll be devastated. Iāll wait for the right moment.
The sniper rifle let out a sharp, mocking laugh.
Some dumb cat and fish? One shot each.
Baji, watching the bear and shrimp pretending to be friendly, curled its lips in disdain.
A stuffed toy that just happened to be alive, and a stick with a spirit inside?
The first one was nothing more than a puppet with self-control, and the second was a glorified stick trying to be friends with a primeval vicious beast like itself?
Ha!
Still⦠considering Bossās face, it would reluctantly give them a chance.
Xiaoqing: Bloop bloop bloopā¦
With all his actors in place, Chen Huaiāan was feeling confident.
He now had:
A cat that could do backflips
A fish that could stand on water
A toy bear that could punch through walls
And a sniper rifle he could stroke like a pet
With a lineup like this, he was destined to dominate the pet influencer market.
He could already see money raining down upon him.
If this didnāt make him rich, heād have no choice but to steal bounties from demon-slaying missions or risk exposing his secrets by smuggling goods between worlds.
Filled with anticipation, Chen Huaiāan logged into his short-video platform account.
The moment he opened the homepage, he was completely dumbfounded.
Normally, his feed was filled with posing influencers or rich kids showing off their lives.
But now?
A fire-breathing dog.
An electrified snake.
People running across rooftops.
A child casually bending ten steel rods with their bare hands.
What the hell is all this nonsense?!
So, theyāre not even pretending anymore?!
Back then, any video of supernatural events would be immediately deleted.
Now, the platform was actively promoting them?!
Chen Huaiāan almost vomited.
He turned to look at Baji and Xiaoqing.
A cat that can do backflips? A fish that can stand on water?
Pfft. Thereās already a cat online that shoots wind blades.
If you compared cats⦠some cats were better off being thrown away.
But Chen Huaiāan was a responsible owner.
He would never abandon Baji.
Instead, he dropped a set of dumbbells in front of the cat and patted its head solemnly.
"Youāre a grown Hakimi now. You have to learn to grind on your own and earn your own damn food."
"Your goal is to become a muscular super-cat. Donāt let me down."
Baji: "ā¦ā¦"
Oh.
So Boss wants me to focus on body refinement.
No problem.
As an ancient beast, it had always cultivated both physically and spiritually.
If Boss liked muscles, then it would lean more toward physique training.
"Xiaoqing, youāre a grown fish spirit now."
Chen Huaiāan dropped a pile of black stockings, white stockings, and a copy of
The Little Mermaid
into the water basin.
His voice was cold and commanding.
"You need to learn from mermaids. Grow yourself a pair of beautiful legs, wear stockings, and shake your ass to earn your own food."
"Otherwise⦠youāre turning into pickled fish on someoneās dinner plate."
Xiaoqing: "ā¦ā¦"
I want to run away.
Chen Huaiāan bit the bullet and tried a few different livestreaming ideas.
For example:
Wrestling with Babybear⦠but he kept tripping over his own feet and getting slammed into the ground.
Shooting targets with the Sniper King⦠except the targets kept falling over on their own before he could shoot. No matter how he tried to fix them, theyād fall again the moment he turned around.
Viewers kept leaving.
Chen Huaiāan got so frustrated that he shot the wall in anger.
But the sniper got pissed too, unloading fifty rounds in a single burst.
The bullets collided mid-air, triggering a chain explosion.
The containment suite was instantly reduced to a battlefield.
Fortunately, the 15-meter-thick alloy walls held up.
Only a 10-meter-wide crater was left in the aftermath.
Chen Huaiāan shut down the livestream.
After a whole night of chaosā¦
The sniper had lost weight and looked completely drained.
The strawberry bear was covered in black and yellow bruises, like it had been pulled out of a dumpster.
Baji, on the other hand, looked completely fine. It didnāt even have to participate.
As an old employee, it just needed to quietly lift weights.
Meanwhileā¦
Xiaoqing had already put on black stockings.
It had officially set its sights on growing legs.
Livestreaming.
A golden road to riches.
Chen Xianzun had walked it all the way into a black hole.
"To think that I, Chen Xianzun, once so glorious, have now fallen to such pathetic depthsā¦"
He stared bitterly at his livestream earnings.
Tonightās revenue: Ā„38,000.
Refunds from underage viewers: „20,000.
Platform's 50% cut: „19,000.
Final balance: negative „1,000.
What the hell is this nonsense?!
Chen Huaiāan grabbed a syringe and shot milk tea directly into his mouth.
This was currently the only way he could drink without choking.
He was so speechless that he actually started laughing.
Leaning against his battle-damaged sofa, he mindlessly scrolled through videos.
No more heavily filtered influencers.
No more rich kids showing off their money.
No more endless livestream product ads.
Only bizarre supernatural videos.
Suddenly, his finger stopped.
ćBreaking News: At 9 PM Capital Time, the Forestry Bureau Director of C-Province, Li Wenbo, and Deputy Director, Zhang Bin, were found guilty of embezzling over Ā„30 million. Li Wenbo is also accused of gambling, money laundering, colluding with criminal organizations, and even hiring assassins. A total of 57 related individuals have been arrested. The case has been handed over to the provincial prosecution office, and Li Wenbo is expected to receive the death penaltyā¦ć
This government-backed news video stood out like a wolf among huskies.
It slammed straight into Chen Huaiāanās face with its sheer intensity.
The video showed corrupt officials being escorted away by armed guards.
The comment section was filled with cheers.
Some netizens even claimed that the entire corrupt network was being uprooted, and that even their higher-ups would be investigated.
In a corner of the footageā¦
Chen Huaiāan spotted the bearded guy from the Demon Slayer Bureau.
Standing quietly in the shadows of the Forestry Bureau, smoking a cigarette.
"...Trying to move me with this? To make me join the Demon Slayer Bureau?"
Chen Huaiāan snorted.
But his eyes⦠were a little heated.
He scrolled away.
Paused.
Then reluctantly scrolled back.
"...I wonāt lie, Bearded Guyā¦"
"This time, you really got me."
"That was⦠genuinely badass~"
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